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教我爱的男孩

无意中看到一个梅艳芳演唱会encore部分的片段
她说女生的梦想是要结婚,要拥有一个爱自己的男人,组织家庭。
在那场演唱会的片段里,我看见的是她身穿婚纱,很长的拖尾婚纱,很夸张的头饰
她唱的是‘夕阳之歌’ 彷佛叙述着自己的故事。她说她错过了几次让她能穿上婚纱 的男人。
她劝也鼓励大家要好好珍惜身边每个人
我没有她的沧桑,没有她经历过的tough stories. 
就在她背对着镜头,拖着那长长的婚纱,走上梯级的时候,我突然感觉到那是一个寂寞的背影。
我喜欢看婚纱的照片,然后幻想自己未来的婚纱。哦,我一定要披上婚纱,跟我爱的男人牵手,然后他告诉我,要我陪他走完未来的路。 每次看婚纱,都有幸福感,即使自己还是个单身儿,但是,我还是抱着希望,还有心里倒数着的91个月。
头一次,看见穿婚纱的却带出那么孤寂的背影。是我把幸福想得太美好了?

很多时候,问题是在于‘能’还是‘不能’, ‘要’ 跟‘不要’
前者是是尽头还是转弯处 而 后者的主宰是自己的心。
就像你是性无能的,你不可能说你不要做爱,因为你根本无法有那个劲头
但是如果你是千百万个不乐意,不愿意,也没有人能逼得了你。

现在越来越多女权主义者,
不再愿意屈服在男人的权威下
根据数据显示,女生更容易放下一段感情,甚至是一段很长的感情,只要在里头,她已耗尽了她的爱。 
是的,女生只要遇到另一个让她更开心更自在的男人,她能放弃身边早已乏味的男人。
女生一生奉献与顶着以爱为名去寻找幸福。 从古时代,瞎婚哑嫁的年代,她奉承终于一个男人,到现在的速食面时代,她奉承的是那份给与爱的男人。同样的目的不同的手段去得到这份爱。

以前,我总是为自己设定一些条件寻找合格男友,只是这些拥有我要求的男友却有着我不能接受的一面。太年轻的年代,总是被美的事物吸引。现在,开始懂得爱,不是取决于对方的外表。因为愿意付出生命去爱一个人,结果被爱的也愿意付出生命去爱。
我从来没想过爱一个人能谈论到生命去。那些事偶像剧里的剧情。
在现实发生着,像是空气,我们需要却看不到。难道父母的爱不就是用生命来爱着我们吗?
我遇到一个很特别的男孩,他教会我什么去爱,让我爱上了他。他让我知道爱是能用生命去领悟,我那时候听不懂,后来我爱上他,我开始去参透这份用生命去爱的爱。很多以前我不会想的事情,不会用心去看去听的事情,是这位男孩教会我的。只是这份爱,我怎么也比不上这个男孩。这份爱能保存多久呢?原来,当我不再去追问;你爱我吗这些问题的时候,是因为我深深的体会到,爱不是嘴巴说说而已,而是他赐给的那份感觉,真实得你无法去质疑这份爱的存在。

换个角度,爱不一定取于异性动物,现在演化成同性,只是早古时候难道就没有同性恋这回事?还是一直被淹没,不让它浮出台面呢?又是谁定下所谓的道德伦理规定只能异性相吸的呢?
我羡慕也妒忌那些一个人也活得很好的女生,她们提倡与其情绪被左右与其担心劈腿第三者,不如潇洒人间。我想说穿了,她们只是在保护自己,让自己在懂得爱自己的时候,别人也能好好爱自己。 

我不需要白马王子,白马跑得太快我怕追不上
光着脚丫的王子,我也愿意接受
前提是,他有我在寻找的爱。 





男孩,谢谢你
最幸福的是,我认识了你
很想告诉你,我真的好喜欢你,也很爱你。

Comments

Unknown said…
哈哈...好一句“我不需要白马王子,白马跑得太快我怕追不上” I like it! It's funny! 看不出你是个敢爱敢恨的人!有"guts"~我欣赏你!lolXD [PS:重点:欣赏半年前的你,现在的你有待观察~ Blek=P]

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