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只能耐心观察

经验的累积,
我学会了[如果]背后的故事
我们做每件事情之前 我们都会先套上[如果]
深怕 事情不再预料内 还能及时补救

我习惯了 做每件事情都要一个planning
当然也逃不过 [如果] 的 候补计划
慢慢长大时 有些事情我发现真得无法plan
就像 计划存一笔钱 在中间过程 可能 得花一笔不在计划内的花费
只能说 生活充满了 未知数 我已经不能用自己的学识 计算出possibility.

在某个时候 [如果] 往往是 因为内心的不确定 内心的自卑
对 我从来没想过 因为 自己也曾经陷入这样的框框里
并不能说自己已经彻底跳脱这个框框 看看外面世界
只是我多了一个角度看事情

过去冲动的性格 造成了 心中的伤痕
我不能用 [如果] 把事情磨灭
我不能用 [如果] 去否定未来的一切
我不能用[如果] 局限自己的欲望与渴望
我不能用[如果] 失去了自己

我学会用时间去 观察
就是所谓的 [时间未到] [时机未成熟]
因为害怕过往的难过 所以只能让自己用时间 去告诉自己 目前拥有的 是否 能撑到未来

就像昨晚
看到一封简讯
[如果]用自己的 理解能力翻译 倒让自己 想了更多
看到吗?我还是没有跳出 [如果]的框框
结果 我不能好好睡觉 即使再疲惫的我 也会一直惊醒
对 我等待对方另一封能安抚我的简讯

别人的语言 我们都会习惯用自己的理解方式去翻译
却从来不知道 对方的意思 是否 跟我们一样
劝自己不要冲动 好好睡一觉 醒来再看看那封简讯 也许会有另一种想法
因为我不能去否定一个人的付出 在于一句 自己认为 好像被对方否定的局面里头

也在此同时 一而再的提醒自己说 [让时间 证明]

*我一直数着 这些日子 期待那不会是一场插曲 而是未来的主题曲*

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