stay/leave in 1 year time

to,xxx

i am sorry for giving such heavy tunes to you
i am glad that you are supporting me whatever decision i make
no matter when , you are not changing this attitudes
glad that you are here for me

my problem is in between local or foreign
always you know how much i love in others country
i know it will be long for us in times,thousand miles away from each
yet,i do really wanna get a move on it!
It is my dream!
it aint i don like to be in local
just i want have a look somewhere out from my house..
i am scare that i couldnt suit with the life outside
i couldnt take care in;
culture
lifestyle
values
belief
society
much much more i am afraid in..
as i am choosing stay,i will leave to somewhere else for 3 years
as i am choosing leave,i will leave for just months but it seems years for us..

i am sorry for chasing my dreams,
as i know you always wanted me to stay where you are
but i am just doing something for my future
it did something related to rest of my life
i gonna take care of my life first then you..
i dun need any your support,coz it aint from bottom of your heart
always you are forcing yourself to believe in what i belief
always thousands sorry i gonna make to you,
no matter what decisions i make
always i need to leave somewhere i couldnt see you often

so far,it left around 1 year time for me to think about it..

from,xxx